We interrupt this program to annoy you and make things generally aggravating.

Hup two heh hay hoo hay hoo heh heh HEH heh hep hep eee eye eee eye oh huh hup hup hup huh hup one two one two yeah hey yeah yeah yeaaaaah hey one one hep hep hep yep yep.

Right, so this would be soundcheck. You’re not missing anything, I promise.

Delicious Recklessness

“You just want someone to talk to,
they just want to get their hands on you.”
● Eagles

Meandered outside for a walk at 1:47 this morning because, as previously discussed, freedom has infused me of late with a delicious sense of recklessness.

I spied with my little eye…

… two stray black cats who roam the apartment lot, tucked beneath the left rear tire of a large SUV.

… one skittering shadow accompanied by a series of tiny nails, presumably the silhouette of a squirrel concerned about the state of his nuts. You and me both, buddy.

… four silently observant security cameras.

… one University of Illinois College of Law license plate on the back of a particularly handsome Jeep.

… one Kentucky license plate in the parking lot of an adjacent apartment complex.

… Deneb, Vega and Altair aligned in the Summer Triangle.

… two illuminated windows in a condo revealing a dark-haired fellow crouched over a keyboard, tapping furiously and occasionally pausing to gulp unknown contents from a Styrofoam cup (methinks Neil Young would not approve).

… one proud figure in blue/orange flannel pants and an orange fleece jacket, smiling for no particular reason at her reflection.

Stopping by Walgreens on a Saturday Evening

Clerk: [after eyeing me with a motive I was unable to deduce and scanning my Chapstick] I had a duck come in and try to buy some of these the other day.
Me: A duck?
Clerk: Yes. I asked if he wanted to pay by cash or credit and he said just to put them on his bill.

Whatever they pay him, it’s not enough.

Hmm, Continued.

Why do people drive in circles to find a close parking spot at the gym? You're going inside to sweat. Defeat the point, party of one?

Liars!

“That’s the real trouble with the world:
too many people grow up.
They forget.”
● Walt Disney

People need to stop trying to convince me that popsicles aren’t one of the primary food groups.